Living in the Now

| Fashion |

| Yolo |

| Theme Song : Runaway- The Galantis |

| Jacket- Esprit | Blouse- H&M | Jeans- Zara | Sunglasses- Flea Market | Shoes- Topshop | Bracelet- Heart Attack | Earrings- Mango | Belt- Esprit |

         These last few days have been pretty busy. And for once its actually not about school (though I still have a ton of work to do). These last few days have been late night honest conversations, city lights, independent train adventures, laughing till my stomach hurts, really nice smelling apple body scrubs, late night drives and scented candles.
         Where do I start? Well the highlight of last week was probably attending KL fashion week. I was clearly not invited (yet) but I really wanted to get in. Like I had this gut feeling I needed to get in. My friend Emelia and I was watching from the 3rd floor at pavilion. I kept getting excited and telling Emelia how awesome this whole thing actually was. I turned to her and said "We need to get in, lets go get in".
        So we went down to the front registration and there were people crowding around and like those belt barrier things was covering the entrance. I was looking around trying to like find a way to get in, but this was for invited guest only. But then, Emelia made eye contact with the lady at the entrance. The lady at the front registration mouthed the words like "You wanna go in?" to Emelia, and pointed her thumbs towards the entrance. Emelia nodded and called me over. The guard opened that belt barrier thingy for us and let us in. To this day, Emelia addresses her as her "home gurl". We are forever grateful for our home gurl.
         I couldn't believe it. I didn't know if it was because of our outfits or just because there were some empty seats, or the show was already half way through, but it was definitely luck. Walking down the stairs to the end of runway where all the photographers were standing at, was kind of a surreal moment for me. I was like shaking with excitement. I kept squeezing Emelia's hand saying "I can't believe we got in".

Sorry for the blury pictures! I was trying to savor the moment.

         I loved every single thing about about it. The camera's, the tall tall models, the very stylish crowd, the invited guest strutting around walking so confidently, the differences in fashion, the way each individual was not shy about expressing their own sense of style, the very professional looking make up on their faces, the flash of camera's everywhere, the smell of expensive perfume as people walk by, right down to the brightly long runway. I loved every thing about it. I couldn't stop thinking how awesome everything was and how much I wanted to get to this point one day. And in this moments was when I realized how much I love what I'm doing and how much I am sure I'm doing the right thing.
         And maybe I'm exaggerating, and its not such a big deal. Maybe they had let anyone get in. But it doesn't really matter to me because this whole experience had made me feel motivated again. It made me happy and in my book, a day to remember forever.        
        Location for this very hot photo shoot was on the 42nd floor with Emelia. Credits to her for all these photos. Lots of love Emelia. We were actually rushing because we wanted to catch the shuttle van from my apartment to Pavilion. Nonetheless, it was a successful one. This top is no stranger. I think I wear this top way too much. But its just so versatile and matches literally anything. These jeans though. I am wearing it a lot now. It is so comfortable and I love how its high rise. These shoes are just gladiators from Topshop that has a a short heel to give some height, but is still comfortable. This leather jacket you know too well. What can I say? It just gives the whole outfit a much edgier look. I topped it off with a belt, matching earrings and a red lip, to give the whole look some color.

This is Emelia. Without her the day would never be the same.

          I actually feel extremely grateful for this past couple of days. Trying to yolo as much as I can. I'm surprising myself with how much I've been so daring. To birthday surprises, watching the sun set while my classmates and i went swimming one day, meeting my friend Sam for the last time in a long time before I get to see her again as she is going far away to study, dancing to "Nae nae" in the comfort of Jasmine's bedroom, to looking outside the window, appreciating the city lights that light up at at midnight, to going to places I've never been before. I hate to admit how cheesy I am with appreciating all these little moments, but what can I say? I'm an old soul. Cheers to the little things in life that we will look back in the future and smile upon.

Love,
Rachel Khloe Phan

          

       

       

Semester Break

| Fashion | 

| Not waiting anymore |

| Theme Song : Heart- Flor |

| Romper-Mango (MNG) | Sandals- Stall in Seminyak (Bali) | Sunglasses- @mel.low_ on Instagram |

       

        Greetings fellow readers. Its been a hell of a semester break. I actually felt like this was probably the most productive semester break I've ever had. It involved a lot of relaxation, time alone, and restarting the adventure.

        The last semester I had left me a little on the edge. I was just tired and a little demotivated. I had to rejuvenate and start again from everything. This semester break was really much needed.

       I wrote a bucket list of things to accomplish during this semester break. One of them was to do some charity work. I met this woman named Theresa, who was one of my grandmother's friend that was quite active doing some charity work. I met her one day at a gathering and when we were talking she said that there was a soup kitchen thing going on every Friday and asked if I would like to join. I was more than happy to. I don't know why I felt the need to do charity work. I felt a little over my head with the whole city living, high end fashion labels and work. I guess I just needed to do something good. Maybe its just my way of trying to feel like a good person again, but nonetheless I did feel good after. I helped chopped some carrots, ginger, onions and made curry for 150 people. It did feel good.

With Theresa

      I also spent the majority of the time during this semester break with my dear grandparents. I was so bored one day, that I decided to just take a train to visit them. No doubt I felt much more productive being with them. They took me to some of their gatherings (being the socialite grandparents they are) and I met a lot of people. And yes, all these people were at least 20 years older than me, but I found a lot of wisdom talking to these people. I mean these folks already spent 60 years of their lives. They have a whole lot of wisdom and experience to share. And talking to them was a pleasure. With everything they shared,  they said the same thing to me which was "As long as you have a stable income, a loving husband, a nice home and a happy life, you are good to go". And I will engrave those words in my mind, carrying those words with me my whole life.

With Ahma

My lovely grandparents.

       I spent a lot of time alone. I guess I wanted to. I didn't actually know how much I am just thinking. When I was in Lumut, Perak on a holiday with my grandparents, I would go to the beach at like 11:30 p.m. and just sit by the beach reading. There wasn't many people at the resort as it wasn't like school holidays or anything so it was really quiet and empty. I would just sit my butt on these beach benches till like 5:30 p.m. I read a lot and I put my book down once in a while to take a break to just stare into blank space, I stay like this for like an hour without even realizing it. And I was actually just thinking. I didn't realize how much is actually going through my mind. This was my getaway. Like a vacation for my mind to just let thoughts flow. It felt really good honestly.

      

This was me for a good 4 day

      I guess the thing I've came up from all of this is that you don't wait. If you want to go out with your friends go and ask them. If you want to go on an adventure, go on an adventure. If you want to go and have some alone time, go and take a tour around your city. If you want to do some charity, go and find something to do. No one is going to answer you if you don't ask. Take chances. Make mistakes. Feel alive. I'm so glad that I spent this semester break doing things that made me happy. I did things that made me feel like I'm actually living.

      Alright outfit details. I hate myself for forgetting to bringing accessories with me. I love the lace on this romper. I gives very nice detail to it making it look like a chill, flow look to it. It is perfect for days like these to wear to the beach or on a vacation. Extremely cooling. The sandals are nothing new. They are very beaten up, but i still love it. I wished I bought more when I was in Bali. My hair was tied into a side braid that was good to keep the hair from going into my face when its super windy at the beach. Credits to my awesome grandma, that took all these photos. She was very fussy about lighting and did a great job.

      Tomorrow is the start of my 3rd semester. I am not going to lie, I am not looking forward to going back. Just thinking of all the work that will be pilling up very very soon isn't exactly exciting but I know for a fact that when I start doing it, I would like secretly enjoy it hahaahah. So adios amigos. So long for now. If you have gotten this far through the post, you are one awesome person. Thank you for reading. I hope I didn't waste your time. Until next time amigos.

Love,

Rachel Khloe Phan

5 Things I Learned In College So Far

| Personal |

| You've got to be your own soldier |

| Theme Song : Fight Song- Rachel Platten |

      Its been a while. And one word will explain it all. College.
      Its 8:22 p.m. on a Friday. ITS SEM BREAK AND I AM SO HAPPY. This is a the first time in a very long time that I actually have nothing to do. I am as free as a bird. No assignments, no waking up early, no sewing, no drawing. Nothing.
      I know I'm going crazy but I am just so bored. I literally just ended class like 4 hours ago. Having to constantly be working all the time to actually not doing anything at all. Its weird. But nonetheless, I have taken so much from my 2 semesters in college. It wasn't easy at all and its only going to get harder. I can hear every word my seniors have been telling me on my 1st day at college. I still have a year and a half more to go till I graduate, but this is what I've learned so far being in college.

1. Becoming Miss Independent. 

Even though in my case, I am living with my parents, I've never felt more independent. My parents are always busy working and sometimes I need to find my own transport home, or to go to school, or even to hang out with my friends. What every college student tells you,  with responsibilities and all that its all true. But the bottom line is that, you would find yourself being a lone. A lot. Yeah you go out a lot with your pals, and you spend a lot of time in school surrounded by  lot of people. But what about other times? And me being alone was like finding myself. I learned a whole lot about myself. And to find happiness within myself. Because that's when you sort of realize that you don't need to rely on anyone else to feel happy. And you just need to look around because you are never alone. Ever.

A picture taken with my classmates and I when we were on a trip to Penang we took not too long ago over a long weekend.

Surprise visit from my kawans for my birthday. Partying with potatoes, eggplants and Disney princesses party hats was rad. 

Ice-cream on a hot day with Elaineeee

A gangster photo shoot I had with the one, the only Ardie.

2. Its all about the money $

College no doubt eats your money up like a parking ticket machine. You can't really go to places where you go to eat with your parents or family, or go shopping regularly at Forever 21 or even drink Starbucks every morning, because quite frankly, you're paying honey (Not unless you do have money then you can la). With textbooks to buy, and materials that was listed on a piece of paper your lecturer gave you on the first day of school to buy, you're gonna have to crash that piggy bank you've been saving up to buy that iphone 7. Where you eat, taxi/train fares all becomes an issue. Its best to save up and eat at more decent places that is clean and that has good food. Be sure to have your ATM card all the time. Trust me. Mamak stalls are always huge money saver.

3. Food will not always be there.

I have classes from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m. on most mornings. And my classes in the afternoon starts at 2. That's an hour to eat. If you go down to the canteen to eat its all good, but most of the time I would be halfway through doing my assignments with my things spread all over the table, and I don't leave my spot. "I'm nearly done!" will always be my excuse but surely I'm not. There are mistakes and things that needs covering up which takes up more time. Most of the time, my classmates and I don't even realize the time that passes by as we are concentrating on our work too much. What saved me from starvation are energy bars. They are great to fill your stomach and quench the hunger for just a while until class ends. I always have one in my bag and it seems to come in really handy all the time.
Recommendation for energy bars are below :)

 

Some of my Draping Projects

My Final Skirt Project for Drafting that I am quite proud of

My final Mask Project for Color Theory in my 1st semester

4. Catchy tunes are everything. 

 When you are at school at 10 p.m. at night, wishing you were home but omg "I freaking need to finish my assignment". I get it. It sucks. When you are in the classroom with bad lighting and a oily face, you just want to go home and crawl into bed. Maybe take a nice shower. Maybe re-watching "How I Met Your Mother". I get it. Been there, done that. But the ugly truth is that you can't. You need to get your ass back in there and finish it. The faster you finish it, the faster you can go. Put your headphones on and turn up the volume. Turn on your jam to keep you going and on your feet. This has saved me more than a few times.

5. It is not easy. At all.

Going into some foreign place with no one you know and places you've never been is super scary. Whether or not you meet nice people, life goes on. You've started a new book with new chaptes and unwritten pages. The pen is right in your hand and when you take your first step onto college grounds, the pen instantly starts scribbling away. It hasn't been the easiest for me. I'm not good with change and am still trying to adjust. Everything I'm learning is so new, and I might be a little slow with learning everything. It isn't exactly easy for me. You are going to miss your old friends, you are going to miss your home, you are going to miss your family, you are going to miss everything about what is familiar to you. And the only person that can help you, is well, you. And that's what I've learned most of all is that, you've got to be your own soldier. Fight for yourself.

    A few things I've picked up from my trail of knowledge. If you can relate to anything I said, well I feel you. If you have any more to add, please TELL ME! We will share the wisdom together.  I honestly don't know if anyone else feels this way because I go to school and see everyone doing just fine. But really, what do I know.
   I kind of feel nostalgic now looking back at all these photo's and how time passes by so fast. These last 6 months have been such a ride. I love the spirit of adventure and the awaiting of what is coming next. I am so excited with every gut in my body for what is coming. It wasn't always easy but I can really see how much I'm growing and learning. And I feel so fortunate.
    Alright then, going to annoy my friends bugging them to hang out just to kill this boredom inside of me. Until next time.

Uplifting songs :
1. Superheroes- The Script

2. Shut Up And Dance With Me- Walk the Moon 

3. Settle Down-1975 

Not really a motivational song but it always puts me in a good mood

4. This Time- Glee


5. Fight Song- Rachel Platten


6. The Days- Avicii 


7. Love Will Set You Free- Kodaline



Motivational Videos
1. Stressed Out? Tips for Relaxing and Letting Go- Ingrid Nilsen


2. Why Low Expectations Are Good- Jenna Marbles


3. 10 Things I Learned In College- Clothesencounters (ImJennim)

Recommended Energy Bars.
These are some energy bars that I found that don't taste like bird food.
1. Alpen Energy Bars.
The Strawberry & Yogurt ones are my favorite



2. Nature Valley Energy Bars
Honey & Oats are my favorite


Recommended Apps to download
1. Food Panda-  (If you live in Malaysia)
Deliver food straight to your doorstep!! (Great for nights where you just don't want to get out from bed after a long day)
www.foodpanda.my/Malaysia



2. MyTeksi (Malaysia and Singapore Only)
Get Around town! Cab comes in 15 minutes tops. Safe at a reasonable price
grabtaxi.com/myteksi

Love,

Rachel Khloe Phan